Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Pun jokes.?

Energizer Bunny arrested; charged with battery.



A man's home is his castle, in a manor of speaking.



A pessimist's blood type is always b-negative.



My wife really likes to make pottery, but to me it's just kiln time.



Dijon vu: the same mustard as before.



Practice safe eating: always use condiments.



I fired my masseuse today. She just rubbed me the wrong way.



A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother.



Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death.



I used to work in a blanket factory, but it folded.



I used to be a lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the ax.



If electricity comes from electrons, does that mean that morality comes from morons?



A man needs a mistress just to break the monogamy.



Marriage is the mourning after the knot before.



A hangover is the wrath of grapes.



Corduroy pillows are making headlines.



Is a book on voyeurism a peeping tome.



Dancing cheek-to-cheek is really a form of floor play.



Banning the bra was a big flop.



Sea captains don't like crew cuts.



Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?



A successful diet is the triumph of mind over platter.



Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.



A gossip is someone with a great sense of rumor.



Without geometry, life is pointless.



When you dream in color, it's a pigment of your imagination.



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